5 Reasons You Got Dumped

Nothing hits your self-esteem quite as hard as getting dumped.  But surprisingly, most people say they don’t know why they were dumped.  While this may true, more often than not the writing was on the wall, and if you failed to read it, then you can expect to suffer through this scenario many more times.   To help prevent another ugly break up, try to avoid the 5 most common reasons people dumped.

Note: You won’t find cheating on here.  That one should be obvious enough. 

Negativity
We spend time with our partner because they make us happy, even when everything else is going wrong.  In some cases however, the relationship provides more negativity than the rest of our lives.  Constantly complaining about your work, money, and family is a surefire why to drive your ex away.  There is plenty of negativity at our jobs and on the news; we don’t need any more in our spare time.

Romance
…or lack there of.  So many relationships end because the romance and passion dies.  The initial stages of dating are filled with flowers, love notes, and surprise visits.  As time goes on however, we start to take things for granted and forget to share our feelings.  This can spiral into a deep disconnection, but it is also an easy fix.  Make sure you are doing the little things to remind your lover how much they mean to you.

Listening
Everyone thinks they are a good listener, and that is probably because they have never had a conversation with themselves.  Think back to your conversations with your ex.  Did you ask many questions?  Do you remember what he or she said?  Asking questions is an indicator of a good listener as it shows a desire to become more involved with the conversation.  You can also try being quiet for a little while, just to make sure your partner has had an opportunity to speak.  Remember that communication is the lifeblood of a good relationship.

Smothering
There is indeed too much of a good thing, especially when it prevents growth in a relationship.  Did you give your ex enough space?  Did they have ample opportunities to go out with their friends and co-workers alone?  It is important to have some “me time” when dating.  It not only allows us to keep a healthy social balance, but it also gives us an opportunity to appreciate what we come home to.  You can’t miss someone if they are always around.

Quality Time
There is a big difference between time spent together and quality time.  If you lived with your ex and the only time you saw each other was right before you went to bed, then this is a good example of no quality time.  We devote so much time to outside commitments like work and school that it can seem like we have no time left to give.  But you will only get out of a relationship what you put into it.  This might mean sacrificing free time or rearranging busy schedules, but you can’t expect your partner to wait for you forever.  We all need love and attention.  If we don’t find it in one relationship, then we will seek it out in another.

Everyone makes mistakes, but only those who learn from them ever succeed in avoiding the same result.  By understanding why your ex left you, you can make sure your next relationship doesn't face the same fate.

Why wait for the next relationship?  There are steps you can take today that will help you win back your ex-lover.  Find out what you need to do to Get Your Ex Back